One Wish

I've drove over 1000 miles this week. Today, I drove through a flat-out downpour of rain. Last week, I drove through the night to make it home for Friday morning assembly at my kid's school. Baby Girl's class led the assembly and she really wanted me there.

With all this driving, I have plenty of time to think, too much really. I've always been scared to talk much about dying. I guess because the whole "guard your tongue" message and if you give an inch mentality. But last week on the way home I thought, people die every day. They don't plan it. They don't wake up one day and say, "I think I'll have a stroke or fatal car wreck today, but it happens. So, what if I don't make it home one day? Will my kids be okay, will they know how I felt, do they know what I want for them?

Little Man doesn't want me to leave him to go to Walmart much less out of town on business. He always drills me . . . do you have to leave, why? When will you be back, when are you leaving? With Grandma around, Baby Girl handles it better but still wants me at her assemblies, school parties, etc... Today is her 7th birthday and I couldn't make it home, oh the guilt. (Thank you Grandpa and Nana for taking cupcakes and juice to her school birthday party, for doing what I couldn't this year) With our business, you've got to strike while the iron's hot.

My sweet babies, if there's ever a day I don't make it home, please know how much I love you. I NEVER would choose to leave you. Don't you ever, even once, think about blaming yourself, sometimes the unexplainable just happens. If I could have just 1 wish for you both, I'd wish that you will allow God to be there for you, like He's always been there for me. He's been there for me every step of the way, through the very best and worst of times. He never left me once. I want this for you more than anything else. I love you, now and forever . . . you have my heart.

Comments

Catherine Denton said…
Oh man, this post got to me. I know exactly how you feel. I've definitely wanted my kids to know the same thing.

I've been reading through your blog and enjoying it. I cracked up at the one about Grandma. Think I met her once at Little Boy's birthday party.
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