Time to Feel Better
Mom (in her words) is pretty much "sick and tired of being sick and tired." She thought that after radiation, she would bounce back quick. Towards the end of last week, she decided to quit taking her pain meds regularly. She thought it was the reason she felt worse. She complained that she felt better in the hospital then at home. We tried to explain that she was on Morphine Extended Release and Diladid shots every 3 to 4 hours while in the hospital. She wondered if she was getting worse since radiation stopped but I think the drugs in the hospital just did an awesome job masking the pain.
She's been using the dilator as instructed and it's not been as bad as she thought it would be. The outside burns have healed amazingly well. I wasn't sure that it would recover it was so burnt, swollen, and totally messed up. She did have another round of blisters come up following the last radiation treatment. It bothered her pretty bad especially when she had to go to the bathroom. But all in all, it's so much better than before.
The last week or so of radiation was called boost. That's when they narrow the focus of the rays to the tumor itself. So that part of Mom's body was really hit hard with the more concentrated, potent ray, hopefully wiping out the tumor for good. Mom has hurt really bad in that area. I assume that her insides look like the outside did at it's worst. A couple of days last week, she went to the bathroom and strings of skin came out. When the skin came off the outside, it came off in sheets. Weird, because when you get a sunburn and peel, it flakes. The burns from the radiation had Mom's skin falling off in sheets. Anyway, it freaked Mom out, when it happened from the inside out.
Mom's also been struggling with nausea. She has to force herself to eat, b/c food tastes bad. Right now she's lost just over 10 pds, she can't really afford to lose much more weight. I'm not sure if the nausea is caused by the pain, the pain meds, or maybe just a side effect of the chemo/radiation.
Last Thursday, I went to Mom's house around 1:00pm and she was in bed hurting really bad. I checked the medicine log and she hadn't taken pain meds since the night before at 10pm. I brought her the pain meds. Dad said that he tried to get her to take the meds before but that she refused. She's tired of being drugged and is also worried about becoming addicted.
My church has been bringing out food for Mom and Dad. The lady who came last Thursday, Wren (sp?) brought their favorite soups, salad, and sandwich from Panera and also connected with Mom concerning the pain meds. She said that she lives in pain from arthritis and Fibre Maiga (sp?) and knows first hand about pain meds. As she talked to Mom, Mom just sat on the couch and cried. I couldn't understand why Mom refused her pain meds but maybe she felt like a failure or that she wasn't being tough enough if she took the pain med. Wren told her that it's proven through research that people heal faster when they use pain meds to stay ahead of the pain versus those who try to tough it out. The pain meds obviously mask the pain letting your body relax and heal. Wren really connected with Mom and as a result Mom took her pain meds regularly through the weekend.
She came to our 4th of July bash. She was pretty tired but stayed through the fireworks. This week Dad is in New York until tomorrow. Mom seems like she's okay. She wants to go to work tomorrow. I'm a little nervous about her driving. I told her that I'd take her but she said, "No."
Over the last week, I've dived back into my life, family, and such (have some blogging to do on that) I hope Mom doesn't feel abandoned. She really is still struggling with everything but is no where as sick as before. I call quite a bit to check on her and go by the house once or twice a day.
Next Tuesday, she has a doctor's appointment with her oncologist. I'm sure we'll know more about upcoming tests then.
She's been using the dilator as instructed and it's not been as bad as she thought it would be. The outside burns have healed amazingly well. I wasn't sure that it would recover it was so burnt, swollen, and totally messed up. She did have another round of blisters come up following the last radiation treatment. It bothered her pretty bad especially when she had to go to the bathroom. But all in all, it's so much better than before.
The last week or so of radiation was called boost. That's when they narrow the focus of the rays to the tumor itself. So that part of Mom's body was really hit hard with the more concentrated, potent ray, hopefully wiping out the tumor for good. Mom has hurt really bad in that area. I assume that her insides look like the outside did at it's worst. A couple of days last week, she went to the bathroom and strings of skin came out. When the skin came off the outside, it came off in sheets. Weird, because when you get a sunburn and peel, it flakes. The burns from the radiation had Mom's skin falling off in sheets. Anyway, it freaked Mom out, when it happened from the inside out.
Mom's also been struggling with nausea. She has to force herself to eat, b/c food tastes bad. Right now she's lost just over 10 pds, she can't really afford to lose much more weight. I'm not sure if the nausea is caused by the pain, the pain meds, or maybe just a side effect of the chemo/radiation.
Last Thursday, I went to Mom's house around 1:00pm and she was in bed hurting really bad. I checked the medicine log and she hadn't taken pain meds since the night before at 10pm. I brought her the pain meds. Dad said that he tried to get her to take the meds before but that she refused. She's tired of being drugged and is also worried about becoming addicted.
My church has been bringing out food for Mom and Dad. The lady who came last Thursday, Wren (sp?) brought their favorite soups, salad, and sandwich from Panera and also connected with Mom concerning the pain meds. She said that she lives in pain from arthritis and Fibre Maiga (sp?) and knows first hand about pain meds. As she talked to Mom, Mom just sat on the couch and cried. I couldn't understand why Mom refused her pain meds but maybe she felt like a failure or that she wasn't being tough enough if she took the pain med. Wren told her that it's proven through research that people heal faster when they use pain meds to stay ahead of the pain versus those who try to tough it out. The pain meds obviously mask the pain letting your body relax and heal. Wren really connected with Mom and as a result Mom took her pain meds regularly through the weekend.
She came to our 4th of July bash. She was pretty tired but stayed through the fireworks. This week Dad is in New York until tomorrow. Mom seems like she's okay. She wants to go to work tomorrow. I'm a little nervous about her driving. I told her that I'd take her but she said, "No."
Over the last week, I've dived back into my life, family, and such (have some blogging to do on that) I hope Mom doesn't feel abandoned. She really is still struggling with everything but is no where as sick as before. I call quite a bit to check on her and go by the house once or twice a day.
Next Tuesday, she has a doctor's appointment with her oncologist. I'm sure we'll know more about upcoming tests then.
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